First of all, let me clarify that I love my husband. And all of his engineering ways.
If you are familiar with DISC personality profiles, you can already guess that he’s a C. I am a D. So it is a combination of one who MUST have each cell in the spreadsheet completed and one who wants to know the bottom line only. Profiling is great-instead of getting frustrated with your spouse-or clients-you know better how to reach them where they are. For example, if you interrupt a C in mid-sentence, they will tense up and immediately start over the sentence because Point A only concludes with Point B. ONLY.
Every year, on the day after Thanksgiving, we head to the mountains to find our Christmas tree. There is a reason that North Carolina Fraser Firs are coveted around the country-plenty of branches, just the right needle length, and of course that smell!
Today it’s a balmy 22 degrees at the tree farm. With 15mph wind, that creates a 9 degree temp. Now, I know we are Southern and thus not accustomed to cold-but y’all-that is COLD.
Me: “We know the height, let’s just find one and get back in the car.”
Steve: “I didn’t drive 2 hours to the mountains to get just any tree. I don’t want any bare spots, it needs to have the right fullness, the straightest trunk, and it doesn’t matter if it takes a while.”
Now, I love a bare spot. It is the best place to showcase a special ornament while hanging it on the thickest part of the branch for security. A crooked trunk? Don’t care. If it’s too full, it blocks the door. Oh and by the way, our 8 and 10 year olds are professional whiners when they get cold.
Really, I am good with any of the first 10 trees I see. Kids agree with me. Heck, the first one was probably the best one on the farm. But nope, we haven’t yet seen enough trees to make SURE we have the right one. (Yes, the right one to cut down and put in the house for one month until it goes out to compost…but I digress.)
Unlimited amounts of patience not being my strong suit, and kids being kids, we give up and head for the cabin to get hot chocolate and wait for the word that the perfect tree has been located. ( Hot chocolate which is hot enough to burn the hair off your tongue isn’t quite as satisfying as one might think.)
The look on his face after locating The Tree must be akin to what cavemen looked like when they brought home the big kill. Ultimate man satisfaction. Luckily for our marriage, I have learned to refrain from the commentary about this tree looking like EVERY OTHER TREE.
Once it’s home and covered in lights, tinsel, and our precious ornaments, though, it is ours. And then, it’s truly perfect.
Kinda like the househunt. Both halves of a couple (or if a single, you invariably have a parent or bestie with input to consider) are going to be wired differently when it comes time to make this decision-which is somewhat larger than a Christmas tree.
Successfully working through different personalities and decision-making styles is critical to making the homebuyers happy. It isn’t about you or your personality as much as it’s about theirs. We are therapists sometimes when we do our real estate jobs well-because we have to help buyers understand each other as they work through the process of buying their largest financial instrument.
What is ‘any house will do’ is ‘must be perfect’ to someone else. But at the end of the day, it is not so much The House as it is The Home. Remind yourself and your buyers that each house becomes transformed by the lights and ornaments and people, and when it is theirs, it may just be perfect.
